THAT MOM! You know the one that comes into the school and they go, "Oh here comes.. THAT MOM, again." Oh, as I sit here crying and wondering how to help my little peanut through a difficult time, I ask myself, "How did I become the "that Mom?" Karsyn is having a very hard time in school this year. Tears almost everyday. Benjy and I have prayed about it, the family has prayed for her and we have tried the (give her more love) the (tough love) the (give her something lucky) the (praise for a good day) the (let's talk about it) the (let's not talk about it) approach, and we are out of ideas.
Today we went to have lunch with her to help her get over her fear of eating hot lunch at her new school. Thinking that she has been having better days, were surprised when the teacher came up to us and in front of Karsyn tells us that there were tears again, today.
Which of course set Karsyn into a whole new set of tears and as we hugged her and turned to walk out of the lunch room to go, she is now in a full out bawling session.
Of course Benjy's reaction is to say, "I knew, we shouldn't have come." My reaction was to go straight to the office and yes, I became the "that mom." I was doing okay until the secretary told me, "Well, my daughter cried all through Elementary and still cries about going to school as a teenager. That's just the way it is." Ummmmm... let's just say, I felt myself get a little warmer and explained that this wouldn't be acceptable to have my daughter, who went to 2 years of preschool and a year of Kindergarten and never cried, now coming to school crying everyday.
Ugh.!!! I felt the need to explain to the Principal, as a teacher it was a lot easier to problem solve and work through this with my students. It is a lot harder to work through seeing your own child heart broken and feeling like I can't fix it. I know some of you are thinking... that I just need to get use to it, right? Funny how as a parent I feel so inadequate sometimes in some areas and so confident in others. This would be one of those feeling inadequate times....
11 comments:
I feel your pain! Morgan during her first two weeks of Kindergarten would chase after my van as I dropped her off. ( She too went to pre-school and never had a problem) It tore my heart apart. So of course, I would pull over and walk in with her and stay for awhile. Thenshe would get busy doing something and felt comfortable for me to leave. It took about two weeks before she felt comfortable and at ease. We found some really special teachers that make her feel loved and safe. I would try to pick out one or two and have a talk with them so they became "mom" when mom's away! Hang in there....it will get better!
Oooh I feel for you all:) Those little phases are sooo hard at the time. And they NEVER feel like that. Wish I could blink it away for you. Unfortunately not all teachers are easy to work with but you didn't allude to that being the case. Best wishes and prayers sent your way:)
I wish there was an answer, I wish I had the right answer. Change is hard for anyone at any age. As long as all other things in her life are a constant than the anxiety to the adjustment should subside. It's a big scary world out there, and sometimes crying just makes a person feel better. Continue with the love, hugs, kisses, and praise. You and Benjy are great parents! Good Luck!
Poor Karsyn, that breaks my heart!! I would seriously be crying everday with her, I hate when my kids are hurting and there is nothing I can do to help them.
We'll keep her in our prayers.
Oh man. Poor karsyn. I know that horrible feeling. What does she say her issues are at school? There must be a resolution to make her feel comfortable. Don't worry Kris I'm becoming "that mom" at school right now too even though I'm trying my hardest not to.
It broke my heart to hear Karsyn had a bad day again today. As I told you Kris it was easier to have tough love as a parent than it is as a grandparent. I am sure you guys will come up with a solution that works for everybody
I am a member of the "inadequate" club. I will be praying for ALL of you. I'm so sorry, what a hard way to start the school year.
oh no! I'm so sad this is happening!!! Karsyn is just too cute for tears. That makes me so sad. Is there something we can do? Let me know!!! I'm serious. Does uncle Danny need to beat anyone up when he's there :) jk, but really what can we do?
I'm with you, sometimes you just have to become "that mom". Is it any better? Can I help? Does the school have a social worker who can help? Our social worker has a mentoring program, both with adult mentors or older student mentors as is appropriate. It seems to be really useful. Maybe a scheduled break during the day to call home and share something that is going well. Call me if you think I can help. 612-275-4507
YOU DO NOT HAVE TO GET USE TO THAT! EVER! You be "THAT MOM" and you fight fight fight for that kid! Poor little thing. Just keep doing what you are doing. DO NOT GIVE UP! AND Dont get "USE TO IT" THAT is NOT OK! I love ya kid. Keep the faith...Wish I could help! All I can say is...GO WITH YOUR GUT! YOU AS THE MOM KNOW WAY MORE THAN THOSE WEENIES AT SCHOOL...GO WITH WHAT YOU FEEL!
You are a darn good mom. I could not imagine accepting years of a child crying about/at school. Keep working to find a solution. Consult people you know and trust who work with children. My heart goes out to you two and Karsyn.
Post a Comment